Fool-Proofing Your Life
(Wisdom for Untangling Your Most Difficult Relationships)
by Jan Silvious
Reviewed by Pat Beaty
Fool-proofing is protecting
something from fools.
Fool-proofing your life is protecting your life from fools. The author of this book, a well-known counselor,
noted speaker, and popular Christian radio personality from Chattanooga, is
co-host with Kay Arthur on Precept Ministries national radio program, “Precept
Life with Kay and Jan.”
In part one of the book, “Is there
a fool in your life?” the writer begins by quoting from Proverbs 24:14 NASB,
“Know that wisdom is thus for your soul; if you find it, then there will be a
future, and your hope will not be cut off.”
From this point, Ms. Silvious
describes for the reader, using stories from her case files, how many people
want a decent relationship with a person, usually someone close, and that
person refuses to take personal responsibility for their own actions. It seems that the concerned person is
virtually taken hostage by one whose “open rage, passive anger, oily
manipulation, or sullen silence stubbornly refuses to release his or her
grip.” The author says her “passion
is to offer you hope for a better way to life – a way that honors God and yet
is free from the often tyrannical nature of the difficult person in your life.”
This writer uses many Biblical
references and describes the fool as deceitful and completely self-serving who
cannot be dealt with in an ordinary loving Christian way. There are ways to
minimize his constant harmful effect on you, but he is not amenable to
change.
“To hug a fool is like hugging a
fan, you will only be stirred up in the process.” Ms. Silvious tells us that she is not as concerned for the
fool (although we must love and forgive him.) She is concerned about the relentless physical and emotional
damage that one suffers, sometimes over a period of many years, as one tries to
live with, apologize for, apologize to, and change this person who is utterly
beyond hope. She is absolutely
certain, and uses the Bible to back her up, that this type of person is without
hope (except perhaps by God.)
If you do not understand just what
a fool is, or an ordinary person’s relationship to one, let me urge you to read
this fascinating book. I was
impressed by how easy it was to understand the author’s meanings. She writes to the reader as if she were
talking to him face to face.
Perhaps one of the most interesting portions of the work is in the
chapter, “New Strategies for Old Battles” – under the simple word “Detach”.
If you struggle with difficult
relationships or know someone who does, take a look at this fascinating work by
Jan Silvious.
For more book reviews by Pat Beaty, check out his blog at http://patbeaty.blogspot.com/
April 20, 2012
